Kurtwood Smith's a BAMF

And he'll put a boot up your ass.


After memorable turns as Robert Sean Leonard's prick dad in Dead Poet's Society and as Eric Foreman's (funny) prick dad in That 70s Show, Kurtwood Smith decided to expand his horizons by playing...a prick senator on 24.

So three cheers for variety.

But he basically stood up to Jack Bauer this week, and that's just not done. He called Bauer out for threatening him to help an investigation with no base.

Is it wrong that I wanted him to call Jack a "Dumbass" and send him back to the Vista Cruiser?

I thought it would happen when he was on House too.

Cover Wars: The Good, The Bad, and Madonna

As discussed in the last post, cover songs are a varied bunch. They can be awesome and better than its predecessor. They can be mediocre and not worth remarking on. More often than not, they flatline the very song they're trying to revive.

For the record, Don McLean should never be revived. I'm looking at you, Christiansen New Years Eve gathering. No more. And quit it with the Bohemian Rhapsody, while you're at it.

So here's a few good ones to keep in mind. The Fugees did a good job with "Killing Me Softly" by Roberta Flack (although they could do without Wyclef's ONE TIME! in the background). I attribute this to Lauryn Hill's voice sort of sounding like Flack's. And Fountains of Wayne earned cool points for "Baby One More Time" as mentioned in the last post (Travis too, kids). I am also a big fan of The Killers doing "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun." And this one's a little more obscure, but Editors covering Gorillaz's "Feel Good Inc." And check out Cake's "I Will Survive" and Aqualung's "Somebody to Love." And sheerly because they took a Stevie Nicks song and made it sound good, The Dixie Chicks for "Landslide."

The ones I thought were average are versions that people seem to like more than me. While Michael Buble's "Fever" holds a special place in my heart, I feel like Peggy Lee's original is just as good. Frickin' A covering "Jesse's Girl" is okay, but not necessarily better than Rick Springfield's 80s anthem. This goes for The Ataris covering "Boys of Summer" too. And The Donnas made a good attempt at REO Speedwagon's power ballad "Keep On Lovin' You," but I wouldn't say it's better than the original. I want to say that Coldplay playing "Can't Get You Out of My Head" by Kylie Minogue is superior to the original, but really, it's about equal—Coldplay has the advantage of Chris Martin's voice and the band backing him, but Kylie Minogue has the advantage of synthesizers and her own voice.

As far as the bad ones go? I would vote Mariah Carey covering "Bringin' On The Heartache" by Def Leppard was a crime against my ears. Sheryl Crow covering "Sweet Child O' Mine" is also not right. Rihanna is not M.I.A. and should not sing "Paper Planes." Furthermore, the Counting Crows should not partner with Vanessa Carlton to sing Joni Mitchell's "Big Yellow Taxi."

Any others?

Endless Love: Cullen vs. Alpert

So as I was watching Lost tonight, I had a thought. A lot of girls I know have become obsessed with one Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson). They like his protectiveness of Bella, his greasy bedhead, his eyes, the stubble, etc. In real life, they like Robert Pattinson's British accent.

Now I agree, the immortality thing is kind of hot. He's lived, he has wisdom and experience, and he has something of a baby face. But when I think of sexy immortals, I'm not usually thinking of this greasy mug. My first thought usually is David Boreanaz on Angel (my fellow Parkie!). And then I think of a very sexy immortal, also of questionable morals and age: Richard Alpert.

So he guy-lines. Whatever. I have a thing for tall dark and handsome. And the fact that he knows how to properly use make-up isn't completely off-base or a turn off. Richard Alpert has a few advantages over Edward Cullen. He's not a vampire, which would not work for some girls. But Alpert lives on a beautiful island, which his girlfriend would presumably visit. He seems to be indestructible, so that's good. He's physically attractive. And if it doesn't work out, he's surrounded by good looking men that are willing to date outside their pool (because really, Sawyer can only get with Kate so many times, and Juliet seems to accept her role as second fiddle).

Advantage? Dharma's own. Sorry, Eddie.