Talking 'Bout My Generation?

The last few days I've been talking about generations with people, and I've found a problem. My generation really has no concrete name or set dates. In my family, my generation goes from my oldest cousin Joe (who was born in 1975, if I remember right, he's 13 years younger than my Mom) to my youngest cousin, Cameron (who at this point...I don't even know when he was born. He's younger than Corinne, so mid to late 1990s). So the generation really spans about 25 years, which is kind of nuts and is atributed to the fact that my Aunt Linda is 11 years older than my Mom. The age gap on my Dad's side is less obvious (and helped exponentially by everyone being on Facebook): My oldest cousin was born in the early 1980s (Nathan) and my youngest was in the late 90s/early 2000s (Nathan's brother, Sean). The thing is, a ton of the generations before us had real identifiers. Our grandparents were The Greatest Generation (1901-1930). Our parents were either Baby Boomers (1946-1955) or Generation Jones (1955-1964, and named for "Keeping Up With The Joneses"). My oldest cousins, despite the fact that we're all the same generation of our family, would be considered Generation X (1965-1980), and the rest would be lumped in with me. The names in the running for our generation (1981-2000)? There are a few.

There's Generation Y, which stems from the previous kids being called Generation X (and the classifyers having no sense of originality). But there's also the option of being called "Millenials," or those who came of age during the new Millenium. Some consider us "Echo Boomers," because our birth rate was similar to that of the Baby Boom, and we echo that generation (many of our parents). Ron Alsop termed us "Trophy Kids," relating to our unending quest to succeed and live up to parental expectations. And still more lump us with the generation following us (more on that in a minute) to form Generation "We," for our self-centeredness and connection to technology—like this blog.

"We are the Epic Generation," says Allie. And I'm inclined to agree with her.

I don't personally know what I would like to be called as a generation. The term "trophy kids" really resonated with me because of my high school (if it manages to keep its reputation up...). And the Millenials makes sense, because the new technology and the new century were kind of a big deal in our adolescence. I think Generation Y is kind of lame; it's only called that because it followed Generation X (and after us it would be Generation Z, or my perosnal favorite, Gen @). So what do you prefer?

Your Google Search is Gorges

So for that last post I was trying to re-find the photo I used to explain the whole "Men vs. Women" debate (I wanted to stay consistent with it, since there were two other segments of it).

So imagine my surprise when I Google "men vs. women" in the image search and I find the photo on page two.

Only rather than saying it's from the original site that I found it on, it came up with this blog (!!!).

I've made it! I'm on page 2 of a Google image search!

Men vs. Women: Young and Restless in China

I've done this segment only twice before, but after PSEA the other day, I once again thought it was interesting to see the differences of men versus women. For the class, we had to watch a Frontline documentary called Young And Restless in China, which follows 9 young(ish) people through China as it changes after the Cultural Revolution. There were a few points of contention, especially when it came to migrant worker Wei Zhanyan.

Sam: I thought it was good that she broke off her engagement, to be independent.

Matt: I don't. I mean, she was nothing to write home about.

There was also a difference in what people seemed to remember about the documentary. For the ladies, it was the fact that doctor Zhang Yao proposed to his wife at a McDonald's, and how that's totally not right. I agree with this one (even though McDonald's is classier in China, considered to be a sit-down restaurant, it's still McDonald's. And no one should be proposed to with this looking over your shoulder).

For the guys, it was how true rapper Wang Xiaolei's advice on women was. They all believed that women are just after money and not after love, and that's fucked up.

So there you have it. Leave your comments on what you think about this one.

Suck It, Heidi

We here at Your Blog is Gorges are really not huge fans of reality shows, unless the contestants have competitive merit (like Top Chef or Project Runway) or Vh1 does week-long marathons of guilty pleasures (like America's Next Top Model and Tool Academy). So you can imagine this writer's disdain for all things MTV "reality." So when Newsweek decided to spoof The Hills and The City with Barack Obama and call it The District, it was the makings of comedy gold.

So what next? Will they show Barack and Joe Biden painting toenails and talking about their girls' drama? Will Michelle and Jill Biden be sitting on the South Portico and wondering why everything is going down without Lauren there?

A Gift from Mother Nature

Here today, snow tomorrow.

Yesterday was up to 55 degrees in Ithaca, NY, and I was happily wearing a skirt and little to no jacket. I bought flip flops yesterday for the spring and possibly for California.

I wake up today and look out the window and find snow on the ground.

This really needs to stop happening. First a day of bad swimsuit trying-on and now snow? Ugh! As much as I love winter, I'm over it.

Ome-Lent

This should really be an entry on the increasingly popular F My Life blog, but I decided to put it here.

The morning was going relatively great, so I decided that since I had an extra meal to use this week (because of Soup Supper), I would go eat a real breakfast rather than just a granola bar like usual. So I got my Cheerios and my omelette and went and sat down.

It was all delicious and as I'm walking out of the dining hall and grabbing the mints by the door, I realized it was a Friday. And I just ate bacon in my omelette.

Fuck my life. The last time this happened was after watching Senior Research and Alex Guillen looked at my chicken fingers and was like, "I hope that's fish n' chips."

Being John Locke

This is a little spoilery, but did anyone else notice the Being John Malkovich twist at the beginning of tonight's Lost?

Since Locke got stuck in the ground with Christian Shepard tasked with turning the wheel to move the island? He's been a little more messed up and confusing than usual. First of all, that wheel looks like those turnstile things at the amusement parks. Second of all, I don't understand the whole alive/dead time continuum. But more importantly, once he fell down that hole and turned the wheel he fell out of the sky into Tunisia and landed flat. Which reminded me of a little hole in the wall that drops you off on the side of the NJ Turnpike.

Wonder if Locke will have sex with Catherine Keener and discover his puppeteer talents...

Take Cover: Fresh Prince Edition

I personally think it's pretty cool when people cover songs from completely different artists or genres. So imagine my surprise when I found this little gem of a cover by Kay Pettigrew.

Spot the difference.

Bogart Is A 3rd World Country

So the Future Directors of America ("Minus one!" yells Kristyne) & I went to dinner tonight and on our way we saw this massive puddle taking up the quad. We also saw a leaking pipe, a Public Safety truck, and a ton of caution tape surrounding Landon. Bad news.

We get to dinner and I see Matt (RA for Landon/our boy), Bethany (RA from Bo-Basement), and Kaitlyn (RA from downstairs) together. I asked them what's wrong, and they tell me the water main has broken, and Landon, Bogart, and Clarke are without water.

We run into Joanna and Zac in the hallway on the way back from dinner. Joanna freaks out and Zac just shakes his head and says he already knew, because he tries to take a shower. I go back to my room as he plans campus domination with his stolen water supply. He advises me to kill my fish and drink that water, which...ew.

I later find out from a very distraught Kristyne "I'm gonna bust a cap" Fetsic that Park is also without water. Which sucks, because my first class tomorrow morning is in there. We then have the following conversation.

"So I know there's a water main break. But can there be, like, a water minor?" asks Kristyne.
"Yeah. They're called pipes," I answered.

She's On To Something...

This appeared a while ago on Ricky Gervais' show, Extras. And really, considering the movie she won for last night, I thought it was appropriate to post this. She kind of called it, huh?

Your Mom's a Jai Ho - The Oscar Blog

After downing some Frosted Nixon cookies and Chicken Breasts in honor of The Reader, we settled in to watch the awards.
8:31 PM
Hugh Jackman is sexy. He's the host, and everyone with a vagina in the room is in love. He points out how people are nominated for range. Kate Winslet for playing a German in The Reader, Robert Downey Jr. playing a black dude in Tropic Thunder, and then himself playing an Australian in Australia.
8:32 PM
He will be downsizing because of the economy next year, starring in New Zealand. Ouch. He's also doing his own musical tribute to all the movies with a crappy background that he made himself. He goes up to Kate Winslet and sings about human excriment for Slumdog Millionaire. Steps on a soapbox for Milk. He then proceeds to break it DOWN. A cardboard Dark Knight set shows up and he complains about how it wasn't nominated.
8:35 PM
He goes to the audience to get Anne Hathaway to help him out with Frost/Nixon. Apparently, she was sitting right next to Frank Langella. They start to sing and she busts out with a peace sign. Eeeeeeeepic.
8:37 PM
INTERPRETIVE DANCE BREAK!
8:38 PM
He is a Slumdog. He is a wrestler. He is a reader. He is Wolverine!
8:39 PM
He plops down on Frank Langella's lap and decides to get uncomfortable. He seemed okay with it. He then goes up to Mickey Rourke and says he looks wonderful. He then tells him that he'll have a 20 minute delay on his speech. Brangelina is next. No joke, but he's contractually obligated to mention them 5 times. Meryl Streep is up, mentions her Oscar nom record, and says it's from steroids. She flexes, the audience laughs. Cut to a montage!
8:41 PM
Best Supporting Actress montage but the curtains don't work right at first! Someone's getting fired!
8:42 PM
The five living Best Actress recipients are honored onstage together (which is awesome), and present the award together. Eva Marie Saint makes a speech about Viola Davis, Anjelica Houston makes a speech about Penelope Cruz, Whoopi Golberg makes the crack that "It's not easy being a nun, take it from someone who's been there and back. Your love interest is always offscreen" and gives the speech about Amy Adams, Goldie Hawn and her ill-fitted dress give the speech to Taraji P. Henson, and Tilda Swinton's alien self gives Marisa Tomei's speech.
8:46 PM
Penelope Cruz wins! "It's not going to be 45 seconds! Has anyone fainted here? Because I might be the first one." Hilary wonders "Where's her novio?" She does have a written speech just in case. She thanks a bunch of Spanish people, her parents, her brother & sisters, her friend, and a bunch of other people. She thought it was out of reach, but she's very very excited and thinks this award is a form of unity. She's the second Spaniard to win, after her boyfriend, Javier Bardem.
8:50 PM
Kristyne takes over Alex's blog....mwahahahahahahah!!!!
8:52 PM
Alex takes back her blog as a typewriter presents Tina Fey (who looks fabulous) and Steve Martin. Tina Fey gets more applause. He rewards us with 5 minutes of uninterrupted eye contact.

"They say that through writing, you can live forever." - Tina Fey
"The man who said that is dead." - Steve Martin

They present the award for Best Original Screenplay. The winner is...Milk. Well, the writer. He's making a political statement, but it's somehow still sweet. Pro-gay message, very overt, still sweet. He thanks God for giving the world Harvey Milk.
8:59 PM
Fey and Martin also present the Best Adapted Screenplay. Martin tells Fey not to fall in love with him, mid-sentence. Kristyne contines to rag on the screenplays that show up, saying "you can't express inept!" Slumdog Millionaire wins, and I am once again wrong. He thanks Vikas Swarup, who wrote the book he adapted, his parents, his wife, the cast and crew, and Danny and Christian, his "other two Musketeers."
9:03 PM
Jack Black and Jennifer Anniston present together for Best Animated Feature. Jack Black says that he made more money with animation than live action. Anniston is pissed. He takes all his money and bets it on Pixar (Ouch!). Montage time! And Wall-E wins. Because it's Pixar. Thankfully, the maker is very gracious. He thanks his drama teacher for casting him in Hello, Dolly!
9:08 PM
Anniston and Black present the Best Animated Short Film. Apparently, Jack Black didn't watch anything he wasn't in. I'm rooting for Presto, the winner is...La Maison en Petit Cubes. Surprisingly, the maker isn't French.

"Yay, Asian people!" says Kristyne.
9:15 PM
Hugh Jackman starts talking about pre-production. In a warehouse-looking bit, Daniel Craig and Sarah Jessia Parker present the award for Best Art Direction. I am SHOCKED to hear that Allie voted for Revolutionary Road in our own little poll. The winner is The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. The winners are psyched, they thank their crews in New Orleans, St. Thomas, Montreal, and Los Angeles. They thank the producers for leaving them alone, and thank David Fincher. And his wife.
9:19 PM
Craig and Parker are also presenting Best Costume Design. The winner is The Duchess, which gets me a third star on the chart. The guy who wins thanks the musician for the film, his promoters, his crew and the cast, as well as a few others. Finally he thanks Keira Knightley for being "one classy lady."
9:22 PM
Craig and Parker are also (Jesus) presenting Best Makeup. The winner is The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. My 4th star is added to the chart and the guy who wins has a nice long list of people to thank. He talks too fast for me to catch any of their names, except for Brad Pitt, Taraji P. Henson, and Cate Blanchett.
9:25 PM
Robert Pattinson (blech) and Amanda Seyfried (yay!) present a romance montage to "Lovers in Japan" by Coldplay (!!!). There's a clip of HSM3 and Twilight. I barf a little in my mouth. They make up for it by ending it with Wall-E.
9:31 PM
Hugh Jackman starts talking about the cinematography of movies. Natalie Portman and Ben Stiller come out to present the Best Cinmatography. Stiller comes out dressed up as Joaquin Phoenix, and it's epic. Portman tells him to spit out his gum, and he sticks it to the podium. Portman tells him he looks like he works at a "Hacidic meth lab." Her dress is gorgeous, by the way. As she presents the clips, he walks aimlessly around the stage. The winner is...Slumdog Millionaire! (5 stars for me). He decides not to thank thousands of people, but he does thank the Academy, the cast and crew who he will thank "each and every day," his family, and Danny Boyle.
9:38 PM
Jessica Biel and her ugly ass dress talk about the Sci-Tech Awards. Casey and I decided that they pick random hot chicks to host these awards so that the nerds who do all that can meet a girl.
9:42 PM
The comedy 2008 montage. The boys from Pineapple Express make fun of this year's films. They do their pothead laugh at The Reader. They sing along to "Take A Chance on Me" and make up new lyrics about Mamma Mia! and James Franco stares longingly at himself during Milk as he puts his arm around Seth Rogen. They then wonder why there's a film crew in their apartment. And if they can make their Oscar into a pipe.
9:45 PM
James Franco and Janus Kaminsky and Seth Rogen all come up to present. They're presenting the Best Live Action Short, and Janus Kaminsky is the first DP to present (he tells someone to suck it, which is awesome). The winner is...Speilzugland! Which James Franco butchers, but the director's cool. He used to live in Germany, he's been working on it for 14 years, and his accent is adorable. He thanks all his cast and crew, and says that he hopes the bald-headed statues has a good effect on his career.
9:52 PM
Hugh Jackman is wearing a fun suit with a flower and a white tie, because musicals are back! He starts singing, and somewhere in London, Anne Northgraves is squealing in feminine glee. Beyonce joins him. He starts to sing "The Gym Song" from West Side Story, and they cut it off.

"MAMBO!" Allie and Norah yell prematurely.

They sing everything, including Grease ("It's electrifying!" Norah and Allie and Kristyne yell).

Vanessa Hudgins and Zac Efron show up, and it's been ruined for me.
10:01 PM
Montage of all the Best Supporting Actor winners. My favorite bit is Jack Palance doing the one-armed push-ups. Five of the Best Actor winners come up to present the awards. Alan Arkin speaks first, and starts talking about "Seymour Philip" Hoffman, who is still wearing his hat. Which needs to not happen. Casey makes us shut up as Joel Grey talks about Josh Brolin, and tells him he nailed his part (aw!). Cuba Gooding Jr. agrees with everyone else and starts talking about Robert Downey Jr. "Are you outta yo MIND?" He's mad, because RDJ is taking work from black men, and tells him good luck on Shaft. Christopher Walken creeps me out and starts talking about Michael Shannon. Kevin Kline finishes up by talking about Heath Ledger. Gee, I wonder who will win...
10:07 PM
the Oscar goes to Heath Ledger. His parents and sister are accepting on his behalf, and they get a standing ovation. His dad is humbled, and thanks the Academy, Chris Nolan (director of The Dark Knight), his son's agent/mentor. They talk about how honored he would be, and how compassionate and inspiring he was. They proudly accept the award on behalf of his daughter, Matilda.
10:10 PM
Montage time! This is about documentaries. The music is fabulous for it, so good job Michael Giacchino. The first F-bomb is dropped, so three cheers for documentaries.
10:13 PM
Bill Maher is presenting and jokes "Great, everyone's crying and now I have to go on." He's presenting Best Documentary, and is a little upset that his documentary wasn't included. He tells everyone to applaud. The award goes to...Man On Wire! (6 Stars). James Marsh runs up, talks really fast and thanks his family and tells him nothing's impossible. Simon Chinn tells his kids to have great dreams, but not to do what his subject did. He says "Yes!" and thanks his wife and the Academy for believing in magic! He balances the Oscar on his chin and bows and leaves.
10:16 PM
Maher is also presenting Best Documentary Short, which goes to Smile Pinki (which I voted for beause I liked the name. 7 Stars!). The maker is shocked, and loves telling stories for a living, and having a great family and friends. She thanks her editor, cinematographer, and crew. She then makes a promo for "The Smile Train," which is the company that fixes cleft palates. She thanks her subjects for inspiring her.
10:22 PM
Hugh Jackman talks about post-production, which leads to a montage of the action movies of 2008. The song is awesome, I dont' know what it is. It leads to Will Smith presenting. He wanted to present now because he loves action movies. Because they have people that actually watch. He says that visual effects made "Brad Pit look like a garden gnome". The award for Best Visual Effects goes to The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Bummer, I totally picked Ironman. the crew is thrilled and thank the Academy, their crews, their mentors, their wives, their kids, Brad Pitt, and David Fincher (director).
10:28 PM
Will flubs his line and presents Best Sound Editing. The winner is The Dark Knight. He's very thankful and gracious.
10:30 PM
Will introduces the Best Sound Mixing, which Slumdog Millionaire wins. They're so shocked and excited and breathing hard and the whole audience claps for them. The Indian guy says the speech, and thanks Bombay (Mumbai). He thanks the Academy, teachers, Danny Boyle, his crew, and dedicates the award to his country.
10:33 PM
Will is like "I'm still here," and he presents the award for Best Editing. Casey mocks his presentation. I voted Frost/Nixon, but the winner turns out to be Slumdog Millionaire. They did a damn good job, and I'm happy they won it. The camera cuts to Dev Patel and Freida Pinto doing the Dog Pound move from the Arsenio Hall Show. Chris Dickens, the editing, says he had a great time working on the film and didn't want it to end. He thanks his crew, his family, his wife Cleo, Danny Boyle (who gives him a thumbs up), and leaves.
10:41 PM
Eddie Murphy shows up to present a special Jean Hersholt Humanitarian Award is Jerry Lewis. Kristyne thinks the award is going to "Gene what's-his-face." The montage is accompanied by "Viva La Vida," proving that Michael Giacchino is a big Coldplay fan and Lewis comes out, not looking horrible for his age. He's very thankful and keeps his speech short and sweet and meaningful.
10:50 PM
Hugh Jackman starts the montage of all the nominated music scores. Zac Efron and Alicia Keys (huh? vhat?) come on stage (heh) and present the Best Original Score to A.R. Rahman for Slumdog Millionaire. He and his accent are adorable, and the last time he was this excited was his wedding. He's very grateful, thanks the Academy and a few others, and leaves.
10:55 PM
Now it's time for the Best Original Song performances. "O Saya" is first and it includes Indian dancers, which is cool. A.R. Rahman is the guy singing it! No way! M.I.A. did not come with, she's been a little busy having a baby.

"It's like drumline, but cooler!"

John Legend is standing in with the Soweto Gospel Choir for Peter Gabriel, because Peter Gabriel decided not to sing. Kristyne is waaaaaaay bitter.

"It's not the same when black people sing it!" she says.

And the dancers come back for "Jai Ho," which is also A.R. Rahman, and an Indian chick. They then remix it with John Legend.

"Somewhere Peter Gabriel is killing himself," says Kristyne.

The winner is "Jai Ho" from Slumdog Millionaire. I wonder if A.R. Rahman is offended that one song won over another. He thanks the crew again, and he's adorable.
11:03 PM
The blogger has now left her blog unattended-mischief ensues.
11:05 PM
Alex comandeers the blog back from KellyPaul (one word) and waches as Liam Neeson and Freida Pinto present an award together. They're presenting the Best Foreign Language Film. The winner is Departures, the Japanese film. A sweet little Japanese thanks everybody ("That's me!" yells Derek), and says he's very happy. I beg him to talk more, but he's short and sweet and ends it with an "Arigato!"
11:10 PM
Queen Latifah presents the in memorium montage. She sings "I'm Missing You" as Matt Biddle shows up on his rounds. Kristyne is doing balance exercises on the edge of the lounge couch. I don't quite catch why. I am a little disappointed that Isaac Hayes' clip doesn't include Chef. Paul Newman is the last clip, and he's a so sexy and sophisticated.
11:18 PM
The President of the Academy, Steve Gaines, decided against a speech today. Reese Witherspoon and her fugly dress rag on Ben Stiller and presents the Best Directing award. The winner is Danny Boyle for Slumdog Millionaire. He promised his kids that he would thank Tigger if he ever won an award, so he did. He thanked the Oscars coordinators for how gorgeous it looked in the theater, he thanks his kids and his wife, his dad, his sisters, his friends, Fox Searchlight, and a bunch of others. I get a text from Laura saying "Haha the spirit of tigger!" Danny Boyle forgot the choreographer on the credits, so he thanks him at the awards. He thanks Mumbai as a whole, saying "You dwarf even this guy."
11:24 PM
Best Actress montage! Shirley MacLaine congratulates Anne Hathaway, who looks absolutely touched and has cried for almost half the evening. She says she has many more years of awards to come, and thinks she has a gorgeous voice. Marion Cotillard struggles through her English, but gives the speech for Kate Winslet, who looks touched.

Halle Berry gives the speech about how awesome she is, but then turns it around to Melissa Leo. and says she's far too good to be ignored.

"Worst movie ever," says Norah about Frozen River.

Sophia Loren's tanned Italian self looks like she's wearing a wig and gives the speech for Meryl Streep. She looks inspired and touched as Loren remembers her 15 nominations and struggles with her English.

"Her native language is Martian, so what do you want?" asks Zac stopping in.

Nicole Kidman looks lovely and gives the speech for Angelina Jolie, who looks as stoic as ever.

The Oscar winner is Kate Winslet, duh. She looks honored and says that she's going to faint. She said she made the speech speaking into the shampoo bottle when she was eight in the bathroom mirror. She wants to thank her parents and asks her dad to whistle so she knows where he is (!!!). She thanks her friends and her husband and kids for the experience. The cast and crew was very together and she loved her experience. She thanks Anthony Minghella and Sydney Pollack in heaven and says that she and her fellow nominees that they're in the same category of Meryl at all.

Laura Gray: She's no meryl but go kate.
11:36 PM
The Best Actor montage comes up. I thought De Niro was Keanu Reeves because of his hair in the 70s clip. Norah reveals that her aunt calls Daniel Day-Lewis "Daniel Day-Tasty." The boys get a standing O, and the speeches start. Michael Douglas starts talking about Frank Langella and how awesome his work is. Robert De Niro questions "How all those years, Sean Penn got all those jobs playing straight men?" and says how awesome he is. Spicoli got a mention and some impromptu applause.

"He's looking a little metro now," says Norah. "Milk did him good."

Adrien Brody talks about how many films Richard Jenkins and how he's happy he got the recognition. Anthony Hopkins talks about Brad Pitt, who looks sexy and totally won't win. Because he's Brad Pitt. Allie and Derek and Ryan make fun of how Hopkins is swaying from his age. Ben Kingsley got stuck presenting Mickey Rourke, and he talks about how great he was (and ignores how gross his face is). He's an honest actor with a great part. The winner is Sean Penn. There is mutiny. He gets a standing ovation and totally doesn't deserve it. "You commie homo-loving sons of guns," he says. Little more acceptable. He wants to thank his friends, Cleve Jones, Lance Black (the writer), the producers, and Gus Van Sant. He makes a political statement because he's Sean Penn, and even though I agree with him? It doesn't mean I want him to get poltical on my awards show. He comes out (that was intentional) for gay marriage and Obama. And then he leaves.

Laura Gray: I am horrified by this. Stolen from mickey rourke.
11:47 PM
Stephen Spielberg comes out present the award for Best Picture (duh). The Best Picture montage is first. Some good transitions between them, like the Braveheart/Milk segue. So just in case you didn't catch them, Speilberg announces the nominees again. And the winner is Slumdog Millionaire. And they brought the kidlings! How cute!

"I wish to steal him," says Norah.

The producer thanks the cast and crew for the journey. They had no stars or power or muscle or money, but they had an inspiring script that inspired "mad love." The kids look so excited. The producer thanks his parents and his wife. And they all seem so happy and so am I.

The Good, The Bad, and Miley Cyrus: The Oscar Red Carpet

Even though we started cooking/frosting around 6ish and then eating around 7ish, this blogger says that the Oscars start officially at 8 PM. So despite all the "Glamastration" and my annoyance that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was wearing a beanie on the red carpet (and how everyone kept saying that Jessica Beal looked gorgeous with 8 tons of fabric sprouting from her boobs), it doesn't count.

Okay. On with the show.

8 PM
So Robin Roberts and Tim Gunn are controlling ABC's red carpet, and we're shocked to find that the Oscars don't start until 8:30. According to Norah, it's "Because the Oscars don't start until Kate Winslet is inside."
8:02 PM
Monica sees Diane Lane with Josh Brolin, and questions whether "Nights in Rodanthe" was any good. Kristyne said it was great, and that she had sex to it.
8:04 PM
We admire Amy Adams' dress and necklace. Hilary finds out that the Oscars aren't for another half hour and says "Fuck THAT" and leaves.
8:05 PM
Frank Langella, the 4th bitch in our Oscar picture, shows up looking gray and distinguished with his daugther.
8:06 PM
The room is up in arms because Miley Cyrus shows up. "May a house be dropped on YOU!" says Norah. Thankfully, she's cut off by advertisements.
8:09 PM
Bjork comes on the screen in her swan gown. Oh dear...
8:10 PM
Tim Gunn interviews Valentino, who is more orange than the dresses he makes.
8:11 PM
The "entire cast" ("Liars!" says Kristyne) of Slumdog Millionaire are on the interview stage. All the little kids are there and they're adorable. Danny Boyle speaks for the group and is really honored and happy everyone is there.
8:12 PM
Mickey Rourke is questioned on who he's wearing. Don't really care, he looks like crap. Very very talented and should win the award. But looks like crap. They then cut to Zack Efron and Vanessa Hudgins, but no one cares.
8:13 PM
I'm not really listening, I'm just focusing on how sexy Robert Downey Jr. is.
8:14 PM
Viola Davis looks fabulous, but kind of sounds like the chief on Carmen Sandiego.
8:15 PM
Anne Hathaway shows up. The dress is great, but it washes her out. Norah is intrigued on the size of her teeth.
8:20 PM
Accountant monologue, then the Oscar counters walk down the carpet with briefcases and Botoxed grins. We thought they were holding hands, which would've been adorable.
8:21 PM
Meryl Streep comes up and looks lovely. As does her daughter. Not much else to say, really.
8:22 PM
Monica believes that Penelope Cruz has a "ducklike quality." Norah believes she looks like Audrey Hepburn in Roman Holiday. I am indifferent.
8:23 PM
Jack Black shows up with his wife. Everyone but me seems to be shocked that he's married.
8:24 PM
Tim Gunn loves seeing Marisa Tomei with her clothes on, unlike Mickey Rourke. She actually looks good! No way!
8:25 PM
If there was an earthquake at the Kodak, who would Judd Apatow save? His wife. (Good boy)
8:26 PM
Michael Giacchino is music directing the Oscars! He looks like J.J. Abrams with curly hair.
8:27 PM
The red carpet signs off and puts some commercials before the big show.

"Hey, I'm Here For the Big Show" — The Oscar Predictions

So after the great success of our last Oscar Party, Kristyne & Morgan decided to throw another one. And they all demanded that we put down our own Oscar predictions for bragging rights on a star chart. So here are mine. You'll probably notice a trend or two.

Best Actor in a Leading Role = Mickey Rourke, "The Wrestler"

Best Actor in a Supporting Role = Heath Ledger, "The Dark Knight"

Best Actress in a Leading Role - Kate Winslet, "The Reader"

Best Actress in a Supporting Role - I'm guessing Viola Davis, "Doubt"

Best Animated Feature - It fucking BETTER be "Wall-E"

Best Art Direction - Oh geez, probably "The Duchess." They live for period pieces like that.

Best Cinematography - "Slumdog Millionaire"

Best Costume Design - Again, "The Duchess." There's a lot to do.

Best Directing - Danny Boyle, "Slumdog Millionaire"

Best Documentary Feature - "Man on Wire"

Best Documentary Short - Um..."Smile Pinki," because I like the name.

Best Film Editing - "Slumdog Millionaire"

Best Foreign Language Film - "Waltz With Bashir"

Best Makeup - "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"

Best Music (Score) - A.R. Rahman, "Slumdog Millionaire"

Best Music (Song) - As much as I love Peter Gabriel's "Down to Earth," I pick "Jai Ho" from "Slumdog Millionaire." Sorry, "Wall-E."

Best Picture - If "Slumdog Millionaire" doesn't win, there's something wrong.

Best Short Film (Animated) - "This Way Up" or "Presto." Both are cute.

Best Short Film (Live Action) - Oh dear. Um... "The Pig."

Best Sound Editing - "Wall-E"

Best Sound Mixing - "Wall-E." For this and Editing, my second pick is "Ironman."

Best Visual Effects - "Ironman"

Best Writing (Adapted Screenplay) - "Slumdog Millionaire."

Best Original Screenplay - "Milk" will probably win over "Wall-E."

Ithacalves

The best calf muscle workout for spring? Ithaca, NY.

It's a phenomenon called "Ithacalves," and it's sweeping the campus. Every person you walk by with visible calves have really nice calves, self included. And it's not because they're all gym rats. It's not because they all like to lift weights.

It's all because you have to walk around so much on campus.

I've always had really nice calves and really horrible thighs (I blame marching band), but since coming to Ithaca, my lower legs have been skirt ready since day 1. And it's pretty refreshing to see.

So all you skirt-phobes, skip the elevator and take the stairs. You'll be mini-ready in no time.

Grandmama Drama

Who knew that an 85 year old could cause so much trouble?

As some background, Kristyne & I are going to California to visit my aunt and uncle over spring break. We had some trouble getting tickets, but we pretty much solved it so that we're on the same flights out and different flights back (we get back within an hour of each other).

So when I get a frantic "call Aunt Dori" text from my mom the other night, I wondered what went wrong. Aunt Dori was also curious, because everything was fine. Turns out Grandma said something and caused a tizzy over nothing.

Oops.

My EuroPol Teacher Is The Shit

"La Mierda," if you will.

Aside from having a good sense of humor, an easygoing demeanor, and a there-but-not-there Spanish accent that makes you want to listen, he knows what he's talking about. Dude's from Spain, and he makes the EU seem somewhat easy to comprehend (which it isn't).

Just to cement his status as second favorite teacher this semester (the first is my history teacher, whose doppleganger is shown here), he busts out a tape of Conan O'Brien and shows us the Euro Guy clip (the guy at right).

He then proceeds to say "That's my brother."

Three Cheers for Productivity

First things first: I totally am blaming Norah for my cold. I woke up with a case of the "morning dries" and sniffles, and I was not too thrilled. Dorm life makes you more prone to catching what everyone else has just due to proximity, so Norah is the most likely suspect right now. So I've been drinking my weight in orange juice in hopes of not getting sicker. Right now, the illness is confined to having a raspy voice. Which according to a lot of guys, is sexier than my regular voice.

...I don't know how to feel about this. But there are more important things to discuss.

I feel as if my one required class this semester is teaching me little to none. Yes, camera work is important. Yes, following the news is important. Yes, the Potter Box is important. But with the exception of the camera, we've already learned all this from a different journalism professor.

I would name him, but he has Google alerts on himself, and that scared that crap out of me last time he responded.

So how did we spend our time? Some people were texting, some people were falling asleep. Sarah and I decided to sharpen our strategic skills and start the epic box game you saw above.

Ah, your tuition money at work. Hi, Mom & Dad!

Kick Your Family Guy Ass!

Aside from my excitement over Michael Vartan coming back to TV (although I don't know how I feel about the show he's going to be on; kind of sounds like a Grey's Anatomy thing, which...you know my feelings about that), I'm delighted to see a television show responds so quickly to Christian Bale's rant. So bust out the "Shapoopie" dance and enjoy some Family Guy.

We'll Write A Blog If You Want To!

I'm very excited that Conan O'Brien is moving to 11:35. Mainly because this makes my late night viewing easy. Goes straight from Chelsea Lately to Conan O'Brien. People tend to question my choices of late night hosts. Most prefer Leno or Letterman. Me? I like my late night hosts quirky and ridiculous. So anyone with either a dirty or juvenile and stupid sense of humor is my kind of host. So naturally, I'm a fan of Conan, Chelsea Handler, and of Craig Ferguson.

Just to prove my love for Conan knows no bounds, they aired one of my favorite skits ever: The Men Without Hats Conversation Channel.

T5V6: The Television Formula

There are some times when the TV formula works, and some where it doesn't.

As you've probably noticed, I'm a huge TV watcher. More than I should be, I'm afraid. But I am an avid TV watcher all the same. I watch a bunch of shows, some that are completely insane (Lost, Damages, 30 Rock) and some that are TV's ultimate F-bomb: Formulaic (Desperate Housewives, Brothers & Sisters at left, and my minor obsession with House).

The problem is, certain shows and genres can make the formulaic work for them to drive the story along. But then some are Brothers & Sisters.

I don't need to tell you how awesome House is (although I totally already have), but it falls into the "procedural" category that allows a formulaic approach to work. It also has Hugh Laurie, Robert Sean Leonard, and Lisa Edelstein. Bones falls into the same category and also seems to work—that may be attributed to the quirky lab geeks of Jefferson, the sexual tension between Booth and Bones, or the fact that David Boreanaz is one sexy Parkie. Other (endless) formula shows are Law & Order and CSI.

The problem with the "formula" drama comes when it's not really a procedural. Desperate Housewives is still (somewhat) acceptable, because the writing has enough wit to it, and the whining is counterbalanced by some sort of humor. Brothers & Sisters doesn't have that luxury. It's a family drama centered around five siblings, their respective spouses and children, a meddlesome mother, and a severely underused Ron Rifkin. The storylines are current, the cast is good (and about to get better), but the storylines still suck. For such a priviledged family in California during these difficult times, everyone just whines about the same infidelities, family issues, grudges, and business indiscretions time and time again, solving them with passive agression and wine. Lots of wine. And more whine.

So to the writers of Brothers & Sisters (psh, like they read this) to please get away from the formula and go a different way. Make someone happy for a change. Use Rifkin more. Get Ken Olin on the show more often. Import some more guest stars. And really, the sooner Tommy is gone, the happier I will be.

No One Can Resist His Schweddy Balls

I vote that Alec Baldwin hosts more often.

He's hosted a ton of times before (as 30 Rock costar Jack McBreyer joked about during his opening monologue this past week) and is one of the few guest hosts that has his own "Best of SNL" DVD, which clearly tells you something.

Last night, he decided to make the Cougar Den even funnier with Cameron Diaz for the assist. He also did an acting lesson with the Ominous Cough. He became the fourth Jonas Brother. He even thanked Christian Bale for taking the heat off of his own horrible rant at his daughter.

The best moment of the night, however (aside from Sir Mix-A-Lot's Photo Shop) was the Wii sketch.

And I can't believe this, but the Jonas Brotheres' girly tendencies really paid off for the Digital Short this week. Seeing them in Bret Michaels wear was pretty fucking funny.

Although nothing can beat the Delicious Dish from a few years back...

I Heard She Had 8 Babies. Does She Want 'Em All?

Me: So about how the lady with 8 kids?
Me: Every kid's middle name is Angel.
Kristyne: hahah nice
Kristyne: i remember, me and taylor and derek saw a paper with that woman on the front cover in a deli in nyc
Kristyne: and derek goes "omg it's anne"

Somewhere, Beyonce is Crying

The Island Made Us Do It...And Reptar Too

So after some window painting and curly fries, Kristin and I had a 1 AM revelation. We've decided after a fair amount of Rugrats viewing that Tommy Pickles is the prototype by which John Locke on Lost was formed.

Follow me on this one. Tommy Pickles is a famously bald baby that hides tools in his diaper and likes to go on adventures with his friends. He usually has a flashlight on him, and likes to talk to weird old people, like his grandparents Boris and Minka and Lou.

John Locke usually hides tools (like knives) down his cargo pants. He likes to go on adventures with his friends. He usually has a torch on him, and he likes to talk to weird old people, like Christian Shepard and whoever the fuck Jacob is (probably Christian Shepard). He too, is famously bald. Clearly, Damon Lindelof, Carlton Cuse, and J.J. Abrams were Rugrats fans.

Alex Palombo Is A Sell-Out

Hey, all. You may have noticed the ads on the sidebar of this blog for Blogger, and it may or may not follow my posts. This is because I can get money for this, to better see more movies and talk about them here (and...eat. I need the money). So don't judge.

Squishy Work Today, Boys

I've always wondered what would happen if someone gave Don Draper a book of Mad Libs...

And He's Not Even Pregnant

So M.I.A. being at the Oscar ceremony may be a longshot, unless her kidling hangs in there about another week and a half. Now Peter Gabriel's not performing either!

Per E!Online, Gabriel had creative differences with the Oscar producers, who have decided to change the Best Song performances this year by shortening them down to a mere 65 seconds of play time. Gabriel is nominated for "Down to Earth" from Wall-E, which is just under 6 minutes long.

"I'm an old fart and it's not going to do me any harm to make a little protest. But the ceremony should be fun and I'm looking forward to it."

In his place, the Soweto Gospel Choir will perform the snippet for the performance.

My question is, what 65 second of the song will they use? And what parts of "Jai Ho" and "O Saya" will make the cut? And will they cut off their speeches after 65 seconds too? Because cutting off speeches for the Best Original Song has been known to happen...

He's still attending the ceremony, but he will not be performing. Instead,

Somebody Poisoned The Waterhole!

I have a confession to make. When I get bored, I surf IMDB for trivia and new projects. Or I "trivia hop": I start with one person's profile and hop to other people's. It's almost an embarrassing hobby, but it does guarantee that I know a lot about movies and TV.

So while I was trivia-hopping, I ended up on Tom Hanks' page and found this little tidbit. Apparently, Toy Story 3 is in the works for 2010.

This troubles me. See, I was a big fan of the first Toy Story. It was innovative, it was a great concept (toys coming to life), and it was genuinely a cute and funny movie. Hanks and Tim Allen as a cowboy and a spaceman fighting for supremacy and ultimately becoming friends? Movie gold.

I was a little less excited for Toy Story 2, even though I did end up seeing it and ended up liking it. I still didn't like it as much as the first one, though, and I wanted them to stop after that.

But Disney's been on a track of producing a lot of unnecessary sequels to movie that go straight to Disney Blu-Ray or DVD - some that have pretty much killed my childhood. So my feelings about Toy Story 3 aren't great. It seems like they're trying to milk the francise at the expense of the story—which Disney tends to do. Mulan 2, anyone?

It also seems odd to me, because most of the kids watching Disney these days haven't seen the original Toy Story. The movie came out in 1999, and I figure the average age of a Toy Story viewer is about 7ish. I was 10 when the original came out, and now I'm going to be about 20 or 21 when this one comes out. The kids watching this movie as Disney's target audience are going to be Generation Z. Which means unless Woody dumps Bo Peep for a Hannah Montana doll and Buzz Lightyear turns out to be a closet Jo Bro fan, I don't think it'll work.

*cries* It's just not the SAME! Make it stop!

I Smell A Crossover!

And by "crossover," I don't mean what you do with your feet during ballroom dance competitions.

This year's list of Dancing With The Stars dancers has been anounced. Belinda Carlisle (lead singer of the Go-Go's), David Alan Grier (Perhaps you know him better from In Living Color), singer Jewel, token athlete Shawn Johnson (Olympic gymnast), rapper Lil' Kim, Gilles Marini (the naked dude in the Sex & The City movie), cowboy and Jewel's husband Ty Murray, Jackass's Steve-O, Access Hollywood's Nancy O'Dell, Denise Richards, retired football player Lawrence "LT" Taylor, country singer Chuck Wicks, and computer nerd Steve Wozniak.

Now the casting department for ABC is doing better than past seasons, but really, are any of these people really "stars"?

I vote that this show and Kathy Griffin combine forces to form Dancing With the Stars of the D-List. Because if they were really stars, they wouldn't be forced to wear excessive amounts of sequins and learn the cha-cha for my mom to watch on Monday nights.

Michael Vartan as a Coffee Bitch? I'm In!

Two smart-ass employees get demoted once their least favorite colleague moves up? Meh. When those two are Michael Vartan and Sean Astin?

Comedy gold.

On Location

Check out the crazy waterfalls and gorge jump around 0:22. Even though we all know it's filmed in Hawaii, it kinda looks like it was filmed here in Ithaca, huh?

Only when I jump off 65 foot cliffs, I know that the gorge isn't going to move through time.

Hey, We Share A Name! Let's Be Friends?

It's not every day that I open up my webmail and see a Facebook friend request...from myself.

Hell, it's not every day I open up my webmail and see a Facebook friend request.

So I clicked on it, curious to see if there was some fun glitch on the site and to see if I truly was being friended by myself. Or if there was some other distant cousin in my family with the same name as me.

Turns out it's some guy in Mexico that's older than my dad.

I guess maybe he got kicked off Myspace?

Creepier Than That McCain Impersonation

He's the go-to man for political impersonations on late night sketch comedy shows. And for good reason, too, his Bill Clinton is hi-larious. But on top of his record-breaking run on Saturday Night Live, Darrell Hammond has also picked up a side job as hired thug Walker, the resident creeper on Damages.

If this role seems easy, don't be fooled. It takes a lot to be the creepiest character on that show. I mean, it's a show starring Glenn Close. To be the most disturbingly creepy takes a great actor.

The show itself is kind of hard to explain, so to put it simply, I'll just say it's a show about a corrupt lawyer and her protege with a ton of plot twists and a large amount of murder. The story-telling style...let's just say this show is the Lost of legal dramas.

How creepy is he, you ask? Observe him as he watches someone get a massage.

Maybe it's because there are no cue cards that his delivery just oozes of sketch.

Wailing Ovaries vs. Abusive Pricks

Let us discuss the 2-hour event mixing "two of television's biggest dramas" in an "unprecedented television event." Hold on to your panties, but Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice are joining forces to suck for two whole hours.

This may seem odd to many first time readers, because the author writing this is a woman, and is therefore exactly the audience that Shonda Rhimes is trying to capture. Sexy men! Doctors! Complicated relationships! Patrick Dempsey's hair!

And she had me for a while. I did watch the first three seasons of the show, and it was decent. But after the 156th Mer-Der break-up, the abrupt exit of Kate Walsh for the equally disappointing spin-off, and the whole "Izzie having sex with her fiancee that she helped kill" thing, I was over and out of that show.


Around the same time that I started to hate Grey's Anatomy, I started to warm to this other little network medical drama called House. Both go for the same demographic with some similar tactics. So in an epic throwdown for all (3 of my readers) to see, I give you the Epic Battle of the Network Doctors.

Battle of Good Hair: Men
This is a deceptive match-up, because Grey's Anatomy seems to have the advantage. They have the much-celebrated locks of one Patrick Dempsey, in addition to the spikey 'do that is Eric Dane's highlighted mane. And House seems to be at a startling disadvantage upon examining how bald Hugh Laurie really is. But when you factor in Jesse Spencer's surfer mop and Robert Sean Leonard's face from the nose up, really, House wins. RSL has more hair on one eyebrow than the entirety of Dempsey's body.
Point: House

Battle of Good Hair: Women
This is really an unfair competition. First of all, there are far more women in the halls of Seattle Grace than their are in Princeton-Plainsboro (2 to 1). So for House's women to catch up to Grey's ladies, their hair would have to be ab fab. And since they hacked Cuddy's hair into these bangs, this one clearly goes to Meredith and her crew.
Point: Grey's Anatomy

Battle of The Sex
Not "Battle of the Sexes," but "Battle of The Sex." Because a key ingredient in any drama series is sex. And quite frankly, House doesn't have much of a shot against Grey's in this department. This isn't to say that no one on the show has sex. It's just the shear amount of sex on Grey's Anatomy, and how the whole show seems to center around it, that puts Grey's on top. Or bottom. Or...you get it.
Point: Grey's Anatomy

Battle of the Funny
You heard it. Generally, Grey's Anatomy goes for the female perspective, with introspective (whiny) narration courtesy of Meredith and clever (bitchy) quips regarding cases. Usually, it's one running sex gag throughout the episode, and sometimes it continues from one episode to another. On House, the funny tends to focus on genuinely funny one-liners and unexpected responses to completely serious statements. And let's be honest, the House doctors have better comedic timing. So would you rather watch this? Or this? I thought so.
Point: House

Battle of the Medicine
Despite their vast differences, both shows are rooted in the medical profession. Both have very highly certified doctors in various fields trying to make people better. The difference between the two is at one hospital, people tend to be relatively okay and then die, and at the other hospital, people tend to get really friggin sick before the a-HA moment and then they live. The truth in medicine is, things have to get worse to get better.
Point: House

Battle of Emotional Maturity
...yeah, both shows suck at this.
With the sole exceptions of Bailey on Grey's and Wilson on House, the characters on both these shows are almost completely incapable of having a functioning adult relationship.
Point: Moo

Sorry, Seattle Gracers, but with a tally of 3-2, House just eeks out a victory. Thankfully for everyone, both can combine forces to make a pretty awesome MadTV segment.

When Caricatures Go Terribly Wrong

There are cheesy commercials for the lottery, and there are disturbing ones. Guess which this is.

Why Don't You Go Back To Your Home on Whore Island?!

So my roommate Kristyne has a theory.

At the start of the last season, she started to think that Kate on Lost was, well...a slut. According to Kristyne, Kate is as follows:

"She's like 'Omigod Jack, Omigod Sawyer, Omigod let's have sex..."

This usually ended in her yelling "WHOOOOOOOOOOORE!" at the television screen last season.

So I would like to know if others share this point of view. Or if there are other far more slutty characters on TV that could be sent to this mysterious Whore Island.

If You Ran The Network

It's occurred to me that perhaps my favorite form of entertainment is television. It comes in a cute little box, it's convenient it comes in digital (well, it will), and it generally encompasses music and film into it.

It's also interesting to talk to people to find out what their favorite television shows are, and to see the conversations that come from those.

So the question I pose is this: if you had to come up with your ideal prime-time line up for any given night with any shows on it, what would you pick?

The rules are these. Prime time is defined as the hours between 8 PM and 11 PM on any given day. That leaves you 3 hours to play with for planning. So lay out the order you would put your shows in. No flip-flopping. If you absolutely CANNOT choose, you can put one overflow choice on your "I'd watch this online" list. And shows that have been cancelled are fair game. So if you can't live without your "Freaks and Geeks" or your "Firefly," you can put those in.

I'll start. I would go with a Tuesday night.
8 PM: 30 Rock
8:30 PM: The Soup
9 PM: House
10 PM: Damages

I would watch "Mad Men" online. I love "Lost," but it's on its way out and I really could hear the whole recap from everyone else.

Your turn!

M.I.A. — Maybe In Academy?

After settling in to watch the Grammy Concert (sorry, Grammy Awards), I got to wondering how the Academy Awards Best Song performances were going to go.

Three songs are nominated for the award: "Down to Earth" from Wall-E, and "Jai Ho" and "O Saya" from Slumdog Millionaire. Traditionally, all three are performed live at the awards show. So this would mean that the performers would be Peter Gabriel (for "Down to Earth"), and A.R. Rahman's orchestra and Indian singer Guzlar and Sri Lankan phenom M.I.A.

The problem here is that M.I.A. has been due to pop since she felt contractions at the Grammys, where she performed "Swagger Like Us" on her literal due date.

I just want to know when she will have this little bundle of fun and if she will be at the Academy Awards or if she will still be at home with the baby. I can't help but hope that she will be on the stage February 22nd, but it's not really up to me. Or her, really.

So what do you think the odds are? Do you think M.I.A. will perform? Do you think the song will win? And if she does perform, will she rock the ladybug look again?

The End of an Era

Oh dear.

I want to hear your thoughts on this one. Because students at CSW apparently are all wearing white shirts tomorrow and having a sit-in at the auditorium.

Which, great, you can support your head of school and all.

And I did respect Russo for what he did for the school and the Charter School movement.

But if he did harass someone, then I think he should be fired.

I Have The Cutest Windows in the Lower Quads

I hope ResLife is okay with this, because it's too cute to take down.

I gotta tell you, the inspriation for this one was from our neighbors Kelly and Danielle. They painted snowflakes on their windows last winter with some fake snow, and I always wanted to do the same. I never really got to it.

So this spring, I decided to buy some paints and kept them out. Originally, it was going to just be flowers, but I added the bumblebees for fun and it looked a little cuter.

So there you go. This is our window. At least until break.

Blast From the Past

Ignore the fact that the lovely and talented Victor Garber is talking about Season 2 of Alias, which aired in 2002-2003. Let's instead focus on the fact that Giuliana Rancic is still Giuliana DePandi and is a blonde. And who's that guy who isn't Seacrest?
I miss when E! News did live interviews like this. You know. When it was still respectable.

Deep Conversations with Anne Goodman

Anne: wow.
Alex: Yeah.
Anne: wow.
Alex: Yeah.

Two Words: Ike Turner

There's been a ton of fuss over Chris Brown's latest hits not being on the radio, but on Rihanna. I just want to take this time to look this over.

Chris Brown was arrested on Grammy night after an altercation with an "unidentified woman" at the time, now revealed to be singer/Brown's girlfriend, Rihanna. Apparently, she came into the hospital with heavy bruising and bite marks on her arm.

Chris Brown is known for hits like "Run It," "Gimme That," and "Kiss Kiss." Hopefully he does get punished for this, because domestic abuse is inexcuseable.

Come on, Chris. Do you want to be Ike Turner?

And The Grammys Went To...

Of the Grammys I predicted, let's see which ones I was right about. I have my reasonings underneath the bracket. The names highlighted in purple are the winners.

Record of the Year
>>"Chasing Pavements" - Adele
>>"Viva La Vida" - Coldplay
>>"Bleeding Love" - Leona Lewis
>>"Paper Planes" - M.I.A.
>>"Please Read The Letter" - Robert Plant & Allison Kraus

I would count on either "Bleeding Love" or "Viva La Vida" for winning this category; Leona Lewis was all over the radio this year, and this has arguably been Coldplay's most successful album yet. My vote goes to Coldplay (who will also be performing at the ceremony).

Album of the Year
>>"Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends" - Coldplay
>>"Tha Carter III" - Lil' Wayne
>>"Year of the Gentleman" - Ne-Yo
>>"Raising Sand" - Robert Plant & Allison Kraus
>>"In Rainbows" - Radiohead

Sorry, rap and R&B fans. The Grammy committee tends to favor rock and/or alternative music groups over hip-hop, so Lil' Wayne and Ne-Yo are probably out for this one. My prediction is that the fight will be between Coldplay and Radiohead to take this one home.

Song of the Year
>>"American Boy" - Estelle featuring Kanye West
>>"Chasing Pavements" - Adele
>>"I'm Yours" - Jason Mraz
>>"Love Song" - Sara Bareilles
>>"Viva la Vida" - Coldplay

Again, "Viva la Vida" may take it. But my next prediction would probably be "I'm Yours," because it's constantly on the radio, it's poppy and fresh, and it would be a wonderful win.

Best New Artist
>>Adele
>>Duffy
>>Jonas Brothers
>>Lady Antebellum
>>Jazmine Sullivan

I would like to vote for the Jonas Brothers in hoping that the Best New Artist curse continues with them being gone forever. But for who will actually win, my vote is for Adele. She has a fantastic voice, she's young and British and fresh and very talented.

Best Female Pop Vocal Performance
>>"Chasing Pavements" - Adele
>>"Love Song" - Sara Bareilles
>>"Mercy" - Duffy
>>"I Kissed A Girl" - Katy Perry
>>"So What" - Pink

"So What" is like it. I don't think that Pink will take this one, and I have a feeling that the ballsy Bareilles may get the shaft as well. Adele and Duffy may cancel each other out and girl-kissing Katy may take it, if the Grammy voters are feeling bold.

Best Male Pop Vocal Performance
>>"All Summer Long" - Kid Rock
>>"Say" - John Mayer
>>"That Was Me" - Paul McCartney
>>"I'm Yours" - Jason Mraz
>>"Closer" - Ne-Yo
>>"Witchita Lineman" - James Taylor

Mayer has been more known for dating Jennifer Anniston this year, and I hope to GOD that the voters don't sink to Kid Rock. My prediction is either Mraz or Ne-Yo for this one - although Sir Paul does hold a certain nostalgia with the Grammys, so if there is a surprsie winner, it would be him.

Best Group Performance
>>"Viva la Vida" - Coldplay
>>"Waiting in the Weeds" - the Eagles
>>"Going On" - Gnarls Barkley
>>"Won't Go Home Without You" - Maroon 5
>>"Apologize" - OneRepublic

Again, Coldplay will most likely take this one. Not that the others aren't deserving, but this truly is Coldplay's year.

Yeah, I screwed up. But hey, Coldplay walked away with 3, so cheers.